Thursday, August 19, 2010

A REAL Cover Letter

I found this cover letter I wrote years ago when I was looking for a job.  Keep it real!

I am currently looking for a job so I can make some money to feed my husband and daughter.  I really need a job soon because staying home doesn't generate funds.  Also, I need some place to wear all of my clothes.  It's quite depressing to watch this fabulous wardrobe hang in my closet with no place to go.  Additionally, I've recently brought some shoes that I would love to wear outside the house.
Attached you will find my resume.  I am nothing short of a miracle worker, having worked in DC public schools.  You can see that I worked with some ghetto ass kids.  Although my title reads teacher, I was also a mother, nurse/doctor (all types from anesthesiologist to ear, nose and throat specialist), psychologist, and dentist (yes, I had to pull out a tooth).  I should be able to get any job in New York after surviving that gig.
The adults in the building were equally as ghetto and unqualified.  They were, however, certifiable.  They also could not dress if their life depended on it, which made for very difficult work days.  I should  have gotten a medal for working with them and having to look at them, but I digress.
My volunteer work as well as my previous experiences demonstrate my strange affinity toward working with poor families.  I understand that you have some, so naturally, I will be happy to work with them.
I can be reached at my cell phone, however, I may or may not pick up seeing as I have Sprint.  It depends on what room I am in and if the phone service is up and running.  It's hit or miss.  I expect to hear from you soon.

Josephine Hall


  1. damn that's funny! Replace DC with South Jamaica and you have my resume! AMEN!

  2. Oh my goodness I am ROLLING over here!!! Thank you for the laugh, I needed it!

  3. cute.. so are you not working?